Sacrifice a pawn to save a king...

So, one minute we're up in arms about scandalous phone-hacking allegations and the next a highly successful, and if statistics are to be believed, the highest selling, Sunday newspaper is shelved by its parent company. I am of course referring to The News of the World and News International.

But, wait a minute. Wasn't the majority of the phone-hacking done under the watch of two previous editors? So why are the current employees and editor being made to pay for past misdemeanours?

I'm not stupid enough to think that the current journalists and editor are all whiter than white but it strikes me as unjust that senior bods at NI are 'getting away with something.'

It also frightens me to see just how ruthless a man Mr Murdoch is and when you consider the amount of power he holds in media terms, and the amount of extra power the British government were/are willing to give him...

Finally, I refer back to my previous blogpost: is it really just about The News of the World? Does this hacking-practice not go on in the Sun, the Mail, the Mirror? What about the quality newspapers? Are they totally corruption free? Conspiracy theories abound - unsurprisingly - but News International have proved that anything is possible, regardless of how unlikely, unthinkable or distasteful.

The News of the World may be dead but the story is only just beginning to unfold...

Who's really to blame?

Well, the crap has truly hit the proverbial and is splattered all over the faces of the head honchos over at the News of the World and we're loving it! The gutter press has sunk to a new low and those of us who purport to only associate ourselves with real news in quality papers feel fully vindicated in our abhorrence of such trash 'journalism'.

BUT...

I can't help but feel that whilst we point the finger at the NOTW we are allowing others who are just as guilty to escape their share of the blame. I fear the NOTW has been scapegoated.

Are we really supposed to believe that these heinous tactics have only been employed by the NOTW and are not put into practice by other publications? Are we really that naïve?

And what of the police? Allegations have been made that a former NOTW editor, Andrew Coulson, authorised payments to the police for information. Yet, I don't see headlines decrying the corruption within our police force.

But more importantly, what about the public? Publications like the News of the World would not exist if there were no market for them. Stories involving every last intimate detail surrounding murders, tragic deaths or celebrity divorces would not not be written if there weren't people willing to read them and hungry for more 'information'.

The red-top readers, those who buy the likes of the NOTW, don't want 'news': they want gossip. They don't care about the facts, they just care about how they're presented and the more entertaining, the better. They don't want balance. Where's the fun in balance? They want sensationalist, highly emotive, highly detailed stories and they don't care how the writers went about finding out the details.

If the allegations are true, then it is truly despicable and all concerned deserve to lose their jobs and, if crimes have been committed, their liberty.

But then we need to take a long hard look at ourselves and our relation to other people's lives and ask ourselves, 'Do we really need to know that?' and 'Why?' To some extent, the rise of social networking and an obsession with reality TV has caused a lot of boundaries to become blurred. There's a very thin line between what is 'in the public interest' and what is 'of interest to the public'. The NOTW has allegedly crossed it but were we there pushing it over?

*****
Since posting this, the News of the World has been shut down by its parent company, News International. Click here for my take on that.

Don't worry, be happy!

People tend to think of me as a very smiley, positive, happy person but little do they know of the darkness that lurks beneath! Luckily for me, life is pretty good at the moment but I constantly need to remind myself of the fact because I have a tendency to fall into depression quite easily and, if you've ever been there, you'll know it's a hard pit to crawl out of!

The first time I was diagnosed as being depressed was about 6 years ago but I know I'd been there before. It was just that this time it was really serious because I had a career to think about and a husband who was worried that he was going to come home and find me rocking back and forth in our back garden whilst wearing nothing but my pj's and singing 'Kumbaya'. In the end I didn't go on medication and I didn't receive any therapy. I just had some time off work, found a new job and gradually got better.

My last serious bout of depression was of the post-natal variety. I'd had my second son and he was about 11 weeks old by the time I faced up to the fact that I was depressed. I felt such a fraud. A friend of mine had her baby at the same time as me and her daughter wouldn't sleep, fed constantly and was really colicky. She had lots of reason to be depressed. I, on the other hand, had been blessed with a happy, easy-going baby who slipped into a routine, hardly ever cried and was, quite simply, perfect. So what was wrong with me that I was snapping at my well-behaved 3 year old and wanting to walk out on my family as soon as my new baby so much as whimpered?! This time I went to my GP and started receiving some Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT).

CBT was hard work but worth it and has really helped me to stay on a fairly even keel ever since. I didn't go and see my counsellor as much as I ought to but online resources and the booklets she gave me meant that I was able to make a pretty good go of things. CBT is not for everyone. It's a heavily reflective process and when you're depressed you don't always have the will to devote headspace to that sort of thing. I find it more useful now. When I notice that my mood is slipping and that I'm not as 'right' headwise as I should be, I return to some of the techniques I learnt and they're techniques that everyone can benefit from.

1) Change how you see a situation

Instead of focusing on the negatives in a situation, focus on the positives - there always are some!

2) Keep track of the positives in your day

Try keeping a 'positive-thinking' diary and remember the moments in your day which made you smile. On less positive days you can revisit those moments and this can help to lift your mood.

3) Do something creative

Whether it's a simple doodle, a poem or an oil painting - being creative can be a useful channel for negative feelings and can help you feel better.

4) Exercise

It really does release endorphins and lifts your spirits. I don't do enough and constantly convince myself that I don't have time but even running up and down the stairs a few times can help to lift you out of a head-funk!

5) Be honest

Escaping from the depression pit is very much about being honest with yourself and with others. It can be risky - there's still a lot of prejudice out there about mental illness - but it really is the only way to truly start to get better. Be honest about what's really getting you down - don't transfer the blame onto something else because it's less of a challenge and tackle your problems head on!

6) Get help

When you're depressed you can end up feeling very isolated. See your GP and discuss it with her/him. All sorts of help is available and not just in pill form!

Some useful links:

• Visit the NHS's own guide to depression with an online test to see if you could be suffering with depression.
• The Royal College of Psychatrists have information and resources here.
• You could try the Serenity Programme. Their website has some free CBT resources.

I hope this helps and feel free to get in touch if anything I've written about sparks your interest.

Don't go changing...

I read a frightening thing earlier today that said that an increasing number of children are having their school photos airbrushed! Has the world gone mad? What next? Babies being retouched by Pixifoto before their parents send out the photos to family and friends?

It made me reflect upon my own self-image when I was growing up. I was not what you'd call 'trendy' as a kid. My mum ruled my wardrobe with an iron rod and I have nightmare memories of knee-length white socks and Laura Ashley dresses. I had terrible taste in glasses too - Deirdre Barlow white-rimmed ones were the worst I sported. Oh, and I had a gap between my top front teeth. Thanks again mum. In my photo smile I always tried to smile widely with my lips firmly shut. Not a good look.

Maybe I would have benefitted from a Photoshop makeover and would now have picture of a younger me that I could look at pride with and not shudder over.

Well, no! Looking back at those unkind portraits of my younger self reminds me of how far I've come. They are not to be falsified and nor are they to be buried as too painful reminders of how tough I found things being a child/teenager.

What message are we sending the young people of today if we're telling them that the real them is simply not quite good enough? How can we expect them to stride out with confidence into the real world if we tell them that their reality is undesirable and unattractive?

I fear for how shallow our society has become.

Women feel that attractiveness is merely attributable to the size of their bust and its perkiness; the slimness of their waistline and its firmness; and the lack of wrinkles on their pristinely made-up faces. Men meanwhile are lead to believe that without a visible bulge in their trousers, a full head of hair and a 'six-pack' they are worthless.

Maybe it's time we reclaimed ourselves and our reality and encouraged our teens and children to do the same. When twelve year old girls are breaking down in tears in the school toilets because they've been told to remove their makeup and false eyelashes something has most definitely gone wrong.

A national treasure - The Yorkshire Sculpture Park

I like art. I'm no expert, but then again you don't need to be to appreciate something beautiful, inspirational or challenging, do you? I've spent many hours wandering the Tate, the National Portrait Gallery, the Louvre to name a few and all that art amidst such inspirational architecture is a moving experience.

Imagine if there were a place where you could experience such displays of inspiration, talent and genius in the most amazing gallery of all - nature itself. Well, in Yorkshire you can - at the Yorkshire Sculpture Park.

A friend had told me about it and kept encouraging me to go but I wasn't sure that my two small boys would be all that interested in wandering round a park with sculptures in it. I couldn't be more wrong.

In my naivety the word 'park' had not prepared me for the 500 acres where our boys could run wild. Playing 'Billy Goats Gruff' on the Haha bridge. Hugging rocket-shaped granite. Hiding in steel sculptures. Watching lambs frolic while old sheep seek shade under old oaks. Collecting leaves, acorns, sycamore helicopters and pine cones. Watching herons nesting. Banging gongs in the Jaume Plensa exhibition and trailing their hands along his windchime wall of words. Browsing the gift shop and glutting on gorgeous food.

It's a gem. If you've never been, you've got to go, and I hope this selection of photos I took there inspire you to visit!

One of the many Henry Moore sculptures at the YSP.

Two little boys eager to explore.

Giant rabbit and I mean 'giant'.

The 'Haha Bridge' or as my boys call it - 'The Troll Bridge'

Jaume Plensa's exhibition is on until 25th September.

These aren't sculptures.

Simply beautiful. And big.

Twitterholics Anonymous

My name is Michelle and I'm a Twitterholic.

A couple of years ago I found Twitter and blogged about my love of it. I was torn between my need to 'share' and my husband's total lack of understanding of why I was doing it. I said, 'I will not be forsaking Twitter. I will continue to tweet because it makes me feel good and in feeling good I am a better wife, mother and person. I'll just keep it fairly low key for now until we're back at work and then BAM! I'll be tweeting insanely all day long! My followers won't know what's hit them.'

I lied.

The pressure of work, the business of being a mum and a wife, all contributed to Twitter being pushed aside and for a while I forgot how dependent I'd become on it for information, entertainment and affirmation. For a YEAR and a HALF I went cold turkey.

Most people would say, 'So what?' and to be honest with you, at first it didn't seem like such a big deal. I still had Facebook. I watched BBC Breakfast news. I surfed the internet and bought the 'i'. But gradually I came to realise that without Twitter I was out of touch and ill-informed. Whereas before I was genned-up on all the latest developments in technology and what was happening of interest around the world and what people's take on the news was, suddenly I felt like I was the last to know. Twitter Sing-ups took place, there were births, deaths and marriages and I just plodded along oblivious of it all until it was reported on TV or in the paper.

It was like living in the days before email. Remember when you had use a post box and send letters and wait a day before it arrived and then wait another day or two for a reply. Information took time to reach you and I felt the same without Twitter. The TV news reported what had happened but I came to realise that through Twitter I could find out about things as they were happening. Items of news which were of interest to me might not make it to the mainstream broadcast and I'd miss them completely or have to make an effort to find out what was happening by searching for it.

My return to Twitter was not an easy one. I was worried about what I might find there; a bit like leaving your house unattended for a year and finding that squatters have moved in, your neighbours have moved out and your garden's a meadow. I wasn't convinced that I'd be able to just pick up where I left off but luckily for me: I was! Now it's like I never left but now I'm more addicted than ever before.

I follow more people, comment more, click on more links... Yet again, Twitter has taken over my life but I'm embracing that. The feeling of being involved in things and being on the cutting edge of information is worth it! I feel more creative - I follow creative thinkers who inspire me to use my imagination and creativity. Hence the blogging.

Thank you Twitter and all the people whom I follow and who follow me. I promise not to forsake you again. Maybe.